Green Lantern

TWO STARS: Just as Sam Worthington proved with alien Indians, Van Wilder shows us that white guys from Earth are better than these alien Leprechauns too.

    Giant script issues keep Hal Jordan on the ground, never seemingly able to escape his insecurities and asshole-ness. While not a horrible film, it is the worst superhero film of the year and a mark on Ryan Reynolds near blemish-less record. That said, a Green Lantern 2 could be better if they learn from their mistakes. For instance,

1. No Blob Monsters
"Give me your human body!"

You can't fistfight a blob monster. You just can't. And if you can't fistfight your greatest adversary then there shouldn't be a movie based on it. Hell, even the smoke monster form LOST eventually became a human just to fight the main character hand to hand. Spoiler!!!

A mid-air punch makes everything at least 32% better

2. New Director (Mike Bay)
Damn I look good
Damn I look good

Michael Bay could bring gravitas to the director's chair for Green Lantern two. Sure, it'd be a very orange Green Lantern, but seeing as Coast City is an analogue for Los Angeles.... It could work. Also, bring in a sidekick (preferably Sean Connery) and give Blake Lively's body parts more screen time.

3. Stop the kid stuff

Nobody wants to see a stupid hot wheel track saving a girl. Just make a damn wall Mr.Hotshot. And we don't really care about giant green fists... Just shoot lasers.

4. Fix story and stuff like that too I guess

This article perfectly sums up the majority of the film.